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How do you respond to begging? Do you comply, and thus reward the act. Or refuse, and live with the guilt that it may have been a genuine case of need. Safa Suling Tan weighed the options and came away all the richer for the experience. A boy came up to me today. He said, "Please, give me some money." I looked down into those light pools of innocence and my hand that was about to wave him away stilled. "I don't have any money with me," I said, feeling bad. He would not let me be, and we walked together for a bit. Him asking, and me telling him that he should not be begging. We crossed the road. "Where is your mummy?" I asked. He pointed her out on the other side, carrying a baby in front of the masjid with hand outstretched. I have seen her many times, wearing the hijab. The imam told us that they were Christians and their men have been seen idling their time in cafes while they send their women and kids out to beg. "Tell your mummy not to make you ask people for money, it is not right. Where is your daddy?" "I don't know where my daddy is." In a café? Or perhaps dead? Maybe they were Bosnians. Maybe his daddy was one of the many thousand Muslim men murdered in the Bosnian-Sebian war? I watched him as he answered me. He said it like he was telling me that the grass is green. Then he looked unsure. My heart could not say no. I don't think I could the first moment we met. I told him he had to come with me as I had to go and get the money because I didn't have any on me. He asked where and I pointed to the shop up ahead, a few feet away. He said ok. I asked him to wait for me outside the shop and that I would be back. He said okay. He trusted me. Or maybe he didn't have anything to lose. But I think it is the former. He is only about seven; I refuse to believe that he has lost his trust in people. I ran up the stairs to get some money from my purse. A few coins, might have added up to £2. I did not want to give him the £5 note I had. Thought that would do more harm than good. I did not want him to think that begging is good and that one did not need to work. As I ran back down I told Allah that I did not know if what I was doing was right or wrong, but to let this act of mine be one he would remember through the years and guide him to Islam when he grows up. I found him where I left him. My heart smiled. I put the coins into the small palm. “Thank you,” he said. And he was grateful. I placed my hand on his shoulder and looked him seriously in the face. “You must not beg, it is not right.” “Okay.” “When you grow up, you must work okay?” “Okay.” “You must not ask people to give you money.” “Okay.” “You must use your two hands and work for the money, then you will be happy.” I tried to tell him as simply as I could in our brief encounter. Looking at him, I did not want to let him go. I wanted to instil in him that principle of life. I wanted to teach him all of life’s lessons, about morality and ethics, about Allah and Islam. I wanted him to grow up to be an honourable man who led a meaningful life. His English was not good. I don’t know if he understood me. I pray he did. And that my words will stay with him. Now sitting at my desk, I wonder if I should have bought him some chicken and chips instead of giving him the money. What if he never benefits from it and those men take it and spend it on haram things instead? Why did I not think of this earlier? I am angry with his mum for using him to beg. I am angry that they are making use of his innocence. I am angry that a child should be exposed to rejection and disgust. I am angry that he is made to humble himself in front of creation. I am angry that his little heart is on the line. But more than anything I am afraid that his soul will not be able to remain pure, that his innocence will disappear. I am afraid that he may grow up a good-for-nothing, a man who stretches out his hand to ask of people instead of Allah. I pray that I did not help him along the way with my deed. I know that his face and the sweet innocent way he looked at me will be with me for some time. I hope that his life will be filled with many blessings from Allah. I sincerely pray that Allah will guide him and make him grow up strong and brave, a man with a straight back, walking on the straight path.
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As-salaam alykum. This piece was a touching one. I think the decision about whether to give to a beggar money or not is one each of us has to make at that moment using our best options. Some beggars really need help and some don't. Sometimes we can tell the difference but sometimes we can't. We can only make our intentions pure.
salam alaykum,
this is a beautiful article.its something my mum and i have discussed for a long time.she used to give the beggars but she said she listened to a lecture and was instructed not to give beggars again.there are so many of them in nigeria especially from niger.some beggars would actually refuse to collect money from you because they think it is too small.really like sister salatusule said you can't really know but i usually feel so guilty if i don't give those kids.
salam alaykum,your article was touching, yes u do not know if to give those beggar money or not, because some of them has families to take care of them but the they still choose to beg, but in my case i do give money to those elderly men and women,especially the physically challenge.
great write-up! i happen to have discussed this topic many times with my friends, 'cos living in this part of the world(Nigeria), you come across beggars, almost every inch of your way down the streets.And many of them at least are not physically challenged adults, and also children!
But i would say that it is our duty as muslims, if we have the means, to give to the poor, needy etc, and those who ask.We should take advantage of such situations and save ourselves from the fire of Hell.And also remember to thank Allah that He has made your hands the giving-hands and not the ones receiving.....so sisters, give as much as you can, and invest in your hereafter!
Sometimes we all go through the guilt patch-wondering if we're doing the right thing or not.
Begging, in my opinion is not good. But from their point of view, it seems a necessity.
May Allah(SWT) make it easy for them.
Salam sisters,
I am a Nigerian and from the north where begging is prevalent. The major problem i believe is that alot of these beggers do not have an ocupation to keep them off the streets, rather than giving a few coins to a begger for the sake of buying him/her a meal for the day, i would rather one helped them out with a little capital for business or one employed them. For the kids, if a person can help send them to school or link them up with a sponsor, i believe, the muslim ummah would be better off for it.
Had I been in the same shoes as the sister in the article, I would have done the same but looking deeper, I believe we should be pro active in keeping children off the streets and away from begging
If begging had been a good thing, Islam would have encouraged it....Can sisters remember the Hadith where The Prophet, peace and blessings be on him, says: "Begging is similar to scratching the flesh off your face; so if someone wants to save his face he should avoid it, except for asking from the ruler or asking in case of dire need." (Reported by Abu Dawud and An-Nisa'i)
Begging is frowned at so let us assist those who are in it and discourage them by engaging them.
Please sisters, let us discourage beggers and encourage them to be independent.
May ALlah guide us to the right path.
Ma'assalam
asalam alykum,the write up was very touching n allah has ordined us to help those in need,n if u do not help them they become tout n thieves in the society.so if you have help those in need.
To give or not to give?
It was a touching piece. Personally I'm not happy seeing people begging. Kids and adults alike. I always have the problem of whether to give or not to give especially when the beggar does not have any physical impairment.
Well,the best for me is making ones intentions purely for the sake of Allah.
May Allah reward us and provide for our needy brothers
Salamz Sisters, your piece was mashallah a well written and intriguing one. It must have been a difficult position to be in, being unsure of what’s the best thing to do. May Allah (swt) bless you on the decision that you made.
As-salam alykam sisters
A very touching story i to have been in the same situation where beggars came up to me and beg for money saying please give money before i used to say no but felt really guilty.Once a women came up to me holding a chilt in her arms and showed me a piece of paper as she was trying to say she couldn't speck English so read the paper i was really upset and said to her that she should be ashamed of herself using children to beg for money and sit in the cold with there hands out asking for money we do not know if these people really do need money to survive.Now i have realised that its better to give them a little money if not more as allah (swt)is always looking at those who do wrong so why should we feel guilty if they are in real need of money i am sure there are other ways to receive money rather than sitting in the streets with there children begging.
Asalam alaikum sisters,
charity as we all know is an act of ibadah which is rewarding, let us do our bit & leave the rest. At times u think whether to give them or not 'cos most of them now take begging as a job they never bother to get something to do. when u work and earn a living it is far better than begging. May Allah help better the situation of this beggars.
They are not ready to change what is in their heart and Allah (swt)mentioned in the holy Quran that He will not change your situation except when u change what is in your heart.